What Makes You A Writer?

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My life right here

This question has been throbbing in my mind for weeks. In this journey of writing, it all started in elementary school for me. I used to have these journals in which I would write in everyday. Scrawny etches of chicken scratch penmanship would litter a composition notebook on various days on anything from what nine-year-old Tiffany learned in school that day to the interactions she had with other kids. Little Tiffy was definitely a shy one. It did not change that much in high school. But during those teen years, writing was so exciting for me. Every time the teacher would give me an essay assignment, I would look at it as an exhilarating new challenge to immerse myself in. It was such a thrill and joy to be able to write. At the time, I never realized how much I liked to write until a friend and my tenth grade English teacher made me see my potential.

Today, a magazine journalism degree and a few editorial internships and “jobs” later, I question whether I am still defined as a “writer.” Other than the fact that my grammar, style and prose is probably not as up to par as it once was, I don’t write as much as you would think. One thing I have come to accept, I am a procrastinator even when it comes to the things that I love. Routine and deadlines keeps this somewhat free spirited mind on schedule. If it’s not on a to-do list or there is no deadline, it will not get done. The daily grind of work and other responsibilities constantly pushes this passion to the side for me. So even though I write when I can, I still ask myself this question.

In today’s world that’s only getting smaller and smaller, writers or so called “writers” pop up all over the web. Some people just wake up randomly one day and decide that they are going to be a writer. There are oodles of published content from people who could not write if their life depended on it to distinguished literary geniuses. There are all types of writers: bloggers, journalists, poets, content curators, editors, novelists, authors, song writers and more. Some people can write twenty or more pieces of content a day while others write a little something every week. At the end of the day, they all do define themselves as a writer.

Through all this mental pondering, at least for now I think I can answer my question. I am a writer because of one simple reason: it brings me joy. You would not even know how happy I am just writing this particular post. All the posts, articles, rewrites, blog entries, essays and journal entries I have written in my life has always provided me with true happiness. The ability to pour out our thoughts and give it life is a true gift that all of us human beings have. So whether you write to give your business more traffic or because you report for a blog or news organization, find the joy in what you do because that my friend is what makes you a writer.

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Wild Dreams

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A princess slowly glides down a spiraling stairway. Her prince awaits her below. Everything around is a heavenly glow of white embracing the two in a majestic moment of warmth. The princess continues to make her way until she reaches a full on gaze of her savior. The man ready to capture her heart is an image of perfection at best. Donned out in an all white uniform, he takes her by the hand and leads her to the dance floor. Her heart is full she moves along gracefully with her prince. A lovely sound of classics delightfully drums out a tune enhancing the purity of the moment. After they dance, the prince guides her to a piano and places the soft sounds pattering out from above. She warms her arms around him and feels the uttermost pang of security.

But then she wakes up and realizes that it was all but a dream. Her heart breaks a little in the overwhelming feeling of truth that her prince charming was just an imagination cooked up from her wild mind.

It’s sometimes hard to come to terms with reality. A sweet pipe dream for romance can be the drive that pushes us to a beautiful happy ending. Being swept away by a prince charming or even an enchanting princess feels like the goal for romance. However, that’s all it is, just romance. We must remember that real love brings the good and the bad, the pain and the passion, the setbacks and the breakthroughs.

Fairy tales paint this vision of perfection that is both breath taking, but also disappointing. Embrace the truth in real love and let it mold you. For we are human beings and we are so beautifully flawed.

 

I am

The urge to write sometimes comes to you at the most random times. Seriously, I was driving earlier and wanted to write. It sucked cause I don’t think it’s legal to write and drive. Luckily, the urge came back while listening to some inspiring music from Kendrick Lamar. I’ve been feeling these words for some time now, but today I finally got the push I needed to get it out. Conversations with some pretty dope friends was also part of the product for this piece. Check it out and I hope it gets you to do what you do best – being the awesome person that you are.

I am
Undefinable,
an entity that cannot be boxed in
keep me free and I will be
the truest form of ecstasy

I am
Beauty
a sensation that only
some can see
the delights of warmth, charisma and grace
created as human with no haste

I am
Power
An energy of light beaming through
life at a speed that’s best for me
unstoppable and malleable in space

I am
Imperfect
an organism sifting through life
trying to understand it’s complexities
but blossoming from my eloquent pirouettes and ghastly deformities

I am
Tiffany
a woman meandering in a spiral of comic energy
embracing the intricate elements changing each day
and growing to make a path of peace and joy along the way


 

 

My Worst and Best Summer

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I wonder if I even know how to write about music anymore. Can it be a lost art? Are my fingers now rigid from lack of motivation? I mean, it’s not that I’m not inspired to write; life is an inspiration in itself. My problem is that I’m too busy living it. I’m too tied up getting caught up in it’s sticky web instead of taking the time to mark it all down.

Days heavy with heat are slowly being replaced with the complacent cool of the next season. While the city literally baked at times this summer, my mental state was transforming to liquid form. Life had lifed me, a term I learned from an incredible writer named Evan Sanders. It tripped me up and laughed at me as tears fell down my face. But it’s cruelty was a clear example of tough love. The despair taking over my soul did not win.

I lost the first job I ever loved this summer. It felt like a serious slap to the face because it came out of nowhere. I was ready to get back to work, excited to pour my best effort into it and what….huh?…..really?……You’re letting me go because of:

a)  Lack of Growth (what does that even mean?)

b) Budget Cuts (Aha!!!)

c) Disagreement to the mission (I must have had amnesia the day I ever bashed the mission.)

Nevertheless, my world was turned upside down. It sucks when something you’ve invested so much time in is suddenly taken from you. And it came at such a difficult time in my personal life.

My grandma died just the week before this happened. The woman who had raised me from a baby was now gone from my life. God took her away from us. She’s now resting peacefully at home in heaven where she belongs. It’s never easy losing someone. You know they’re in a better place. You understand that they no longer have to deal with pain. The suffering of this life is an ordeal they no longer have to go through. Yet, it still hurts.

There is also this guilt because I know I didn’t spend enough time with her when she was here. I spent too much time hanging out with friends and having fun. Now I’ll never get the chance again in this lifetime. Giving her a hug when I see her is a past time now left for my memories.

With all this renewed freedom, time was now both my best friend and my enemy. Much time was spent trying to make the best out of such dire situations. Of course, losing my grandmother was much harder to deal with than losing my job. I loved both, however, life goes on.

Laughter radiated throughout my body when a close friend would make a joke. Bliss brought me inner peace when watching random movies with my parents. Hope lifted the happy place in my mind after a great talk with an incredibly inspirational person. Even the quiet moments to myself  in the city I love or at home provided me the strength that was meant to come.

However dark life may seem to be does not mean you must live in that darkness. As long as there is air coming through your lungs, there will be opportunities to achieve joy. The people you lose will always be with you. Embrace the spirit from when they were here; it will walk with you throughout your life. My grandma’s spirit will always be with me. She had a powerful effect not only on me but on the rest of my family as well. We will always love you grandma.

Her spirit will carry me through my darkest days and my happiest moments. This summer in some ways was awful, but it was also the best for me. Never have I ever gained so much strength. Losing my job also made me reflect a lot on my time there. It made me realize that this was probably the best for me. It made me think more about what I want and about what I deserve. I still want the best for them and wish them much success, but this was God’s will. When something or someone is no longer in your life, let it go. For certain, there is an opportunity waiting for you to take a bite out of it’s sweetness. Don’t let the weight of something you lost drag you down. I did for a while, but the time to wallow in pity is over.

I started thinking more about what I require and desire out of life. Losing something I loved so much made me see that there is a position more right for me once I really thought about what I wanted. There is a beautiful piece of passion, excitement, growth, team work, challenge and more sitting in a nice package for me. Once my employment package and I meet, my life can only improve.

I am a better person now because of all that I lost. For a long time, I have not really been able to write. But I am starting to find my inspiration again. I am returning back to me and it feels great. Life can only get better from now on. If life lifes me again, I can smile and recognize the unmistakable sign of growth. Through difficult times, remember to smile; for you are blossoming.

Current Flow:  Lianne La Havas

 

 

R&B 90s Nostalgia

My vision is blurry as the world around me has changed. Guys are rocking a straight, high top fade like the Fresh Prince. Women are walking proud in their baggy, colorful attire. Everyone seems to have this easy going confidence expelling from them. The sound emanating from my computer suffocates me with nostalgia and I become lost in a memory. When the three minutes are up, the environment goes back to the 2014, fast paced reality of what it is now. Then I find the next 90s tune on Youtube, hit play and I’m back again. I’m not exactly depressed about being brought back, but every time I enter the 90s it’s hard to want to come back. I was barely four feet at the time, but it was a period that I can never forget. Every single movement proves important when watching a Dru Hill video. The instant burst of joy jumping under each ounce of my skin when my ears get a bite of Janet’s “That’s the Way Love Goes” is perfection. Not saying I want to stay in the past, but there is nothing wrong with visiting every once in a while.

The Mystery of the Night

Cozy sheets and a soft pillow calls the body to bed every night. It sweetly serenades my low vigor with it’s comforting lumpy surface. I give in to it’s appeal crashing heavily upon its mass. Yet, something still seems to be missing.

The cascading rain outside my window tonight puts me in a sweet and somber mood. I feel peaceful and somewhat connected to the universe. The romantic music playing in the background envelops my spirit in a world of peace. But what the hell, something is still missing.

Ugh. Is it something about this night in particular or every night that brings about this feeling? The atmosphere is pretty satisfying enough as the day comes to a close. Yet, the bed, the room, the sense of it all still needs something. Can you guess what it is?

*Shrug* Maybe the music is creating a feeling of needing something. I may be grown, but a crazy desire to have something in my arms always soothes me to sleep. The hustle to work, dealing with people’s BS, and struggling through adult problems smother my daily trails. Maybe a sweet little reminder of my childhood is a good way to end the day as I squeeze my fluffy cuddly stuffed dog every night. I don’t know how many adults feel that small need to be in diapers again, but something about the night always brings it back.

Sweet dreams.

Friends vs Lovers

The realms of love can be an escape from the harsh and annoying realities of the rest of the world. It’s easy to become lost in someone once you can’t get enough of them. But what happens when this oh-so-perfect person starts looking oh-so-human? Many people tend to run to their friends and listen to them ramble about how this person is just not the one for them. But what are we really seeing when we see imperfections in others?

It’s so easy for people to find fault with each other. One person slips up and we’re so quick to judge. Sometimes, that person really is a jerk. They cheated on the other person, they’re afraid to commit, or they’re just unpleasant to be around (and you ask yourself why was I with them?). But sometimes, they’re just being themselves; chuck full of love, goodness and faults. Who are we to judge them really when we have our own imperfections? Our friends will know little about this person, yet label them as an a**hole because of something so simple that looks so dire in their eyes. The reality of it all is that our friends are just trying to be there for us. In many cases, listening to our friends can be the best thing because they want to help us out of an ugly situation. Yet, it’s always best to listen to your own heart and let your conscious beat through. Consulting with our friends instead of consulting with our lovers can at times dig a deeper hole for ourselves. At the end of the day, it is good to console in your friends for help, but it’s always more important to communicate with your significant other too.

Check out this classic tune that has some truth to this situation.